Workout equipment: Jump rope
Krista Stryker
On working with coaches and mentors, our daily focus quota, and handstands
Happy Monday,
When I started learning to handstand over seven years ago, I could barely hold myself up against a wall. At the time, the advanced hand balancing skills I’m working on today seemed lightyears away.
I didn’t grow up doing gymnastics and don’t have a typical gymnast’s build. So I’m by no means a natural, and my progress over the years has been slow. But I’ve stuck with my training through the ups and downs, and am immensely proud of all the progress I’ve made.
Of course, none of this would have been possible if I had tried to learn handstands all on my own. Learning from others is a key part of getting better at anything.
Finding great coaches and mentors to learn from is one of the greatest joys of life; it’s also not easy to do.
I’ve been lucky in my handstand journey to have found a handful of incredibly skilled teachers that have helped push me to levels that wouldn’t have been possible without their knowledge and encouragement.
I’ve also learned a lot about working with coaches and mentors along the way.
One lesson I’ve learned is that some of the most talented people may not be the best teachers. In my experience as an adult learning new skills, it’s best to work with people who themselves have struggled to learn the skill they’re teaching — as opposed to working with people to whom the learning came seamlessly to.
As you get more skilled at your craft, whether it’s handstands, music, writing, or growing a business, it can become more difficult to find coaches and mentors that can keep pushing your potential. This is a normal albeit frustrating part of getting better at anything.
It’s also common to outgrow your coaches as you improve. This shouldn’t be seen as a bad thing but as a positive sign of growth. Each coach or mentor can represent a chapter in your learning journey.
The most important thing is to keep learning, no matter where you’re at in your journey.
The Awkward Beginner Phase of Anything, and Why It’s Worth It
“If you want to improve, be content to be thought foolish and stupid.” — Epictetus
Very few people enjoy the feeling of being a beginner.
That awkward, bumbling beginner phase is something most people will do just about anything to avoid. I know this because I avoided being bad at things for most of my life, choosing instead to always play to my strengths.
Growing up, I wouldn’t even try something new unless I was reasonably sure I would be good at it. I followed this same strategy until around my mid-twenties, when I realized that I’d need to start putting myself in challenging and uncomfortable situations or risk remaining the same person for the rest of my life.
I’ve tested my willingness to be a beginner countless times over the years, pushing myself out of my comfort zone by doing things like taking up handstands, writing my first book, traveling, and living around the world. Most recently, I began training in martial arts. After feeling somewhat athletically competent for years, training elements of taekwondo, Judo, karate, and jiu-jitsu instantly transported me back to being a complete beginner.
The other day, my martial arts coach taught me a new skill called a tornado kick, a 360 roundhouse kick that’s considered basic level at best for any taekwondo practitioner.
I didn’t grow up doing martial arts or gymnastics and have no natural ability for either. Now, in my thirties, anything involving twisting feels especially foreign to me.
I was acutely aware of my thought process as I began to work the skill, feeling the epitome of foolish and stupid.
A simple way to reframe challenges, HIIT workouts, and the Center for the Science of Human Potential
When you discover that you can’t do something, rather than feeling resigned that you’ll never be able to do it, try the reframe “I can’t do it… yet.”
You can do this with any of your fitness or non-fitness-related goals. For example:
I can’t do double unders… yet.
I can’t do a handstand… yet.
I can’t run a 5k, write a book, live my dream lifestyle… yet.
This reframe gives you room to grow and helps get rid of that feeling that a challenge is impossible.
If you can’t do something you want to be able to do, you likely just haven’t put in enough time or effort to get there yet. The more challenging the goal, the harder you’ll have to work for it.
It all starts with a growth mindset. From there, it takes the right goal-setting techniques, developing and cultivating grit, and embracing failure as part of the process.
You’re not there… yet.
Wherever you’re at, keep going.
